Sunday, June 27, 2010

Playing With The Big Girls

176.365_big_girl_too The other evening, the girls convinced me to go sit with them at the little playground behind our house, so that Jaiden could come ... Jasmine is there pretty much every day.

Jaiden is really hitting her 2 year old "independent" streak at a full running pace ... especially when it comes to her big sister ... she thinks that anything Jasmine can do, she can do too.

Unfortunately, Jasmine is simultaneously hitting her 8 year old "mean big sister" streak. Right now it's about 50/50. 50% of the time, she's still a great kid, and an awesome big sister who's very helpful and kind to Jaiden. However, with increasing frequency, she's also the big sister who will alternately tease and/or ignore her younger sibling.

This image above at the park kind of illustrates the situation perfectly ...

Jasmine and Jaiden had been playing together nicely, then one of Jasmine's friends showed up. Suddenly, as far as Jas was concerned, Jaiden no longer existed. Problem is, nobody told Jaiden, and of course she just assumed that Jasmine's friend was her friend too. Jaiden makes it obvious that she wants to swing with the big girls ... but check out that "possessive" sort of look that Jas is eyeing her friend with.

lol, this could be an interesting next couple of years ... especially when you consider that at some point we'll be throwing yet another little girl (Joey) into the mix ... at which point, I fully expect that Jaiden will go through exactly the same stages with her, as Jas is going through now.

Ah, the joys of fatherhood. :-)

todd

6 comments:

  1. Todd! I am so feeling your pain!

    Break to say awww. Just aww. :)

    Okay, moving on... I've witnessed this "big girl" phenomenon many times a the park. I have a very friendly 3 year old son who walks up to other kids and says, "Hi. My name is Joe." He follows them around even if they ignore him (and they always do...the ones of THAT age). It's gotten to the point where I cringe if I see girls of that age at the park. I just know that they'll ignore the younger kids, and that the younger kids won't understand.

    My little Lily just turned two. Joe is still nice to her at the park, but his playmates try to shoo her away. It's all so heartbreaking, isn't it? Didn't see THIS coming! I can see you've got your unique challenges, and blessings to boot. It will all work out in the end. Right? :)

    By the way... I've said it before, but I'll say it again - you're a great photographer!

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  2. Hi Heather,

    It is a little bit heartbreaking, but at the same time, I try to be philosophical about it … it’s all part of growing up. You could almost add it on to the famous “death and taxes” quote … another sure thing in life is that kids (especially siblings) will be mean to you at some point.

    It will all work out in the end though. Sometimes I think things like this are tougher on the parents. Heck, I’m still thinking about this 3 days later … and I bet both my daughters had forgotten about it (if they even noticed in the first place) before we even made it back to the house that afternoon.

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  3. I totally agree with Todd, that's a part of growing up. Children are always a little bit cruel with each other... But they have to learn that's a part of life... Thank you for reporting these stories!

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  4. Hi Todd,

    I have three sisters and can completely relate. I wouldn't worry about it too much, there comes a time in life when the age gap between kids shows more blatantly and children have a difficult time relating because they don't play the same games anymore or priorities have shifted. I went through this with my sisters, at times I was a great big sister and other times I just wanted to be left alone with my friends. Just keep nurturing a positive, friendly and caring relationship in your family and I'm sure one day they will be best friends when they grow up. I am also sure that when Jasmine grows up she may feel a little bad about treating Jaiden that way and want to make it up to her!

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  5. Reading this article makes me realize how much of life I have missed out. I have 2 younger sisters but we grew up far away from each other due to uncontrollable circumstances. I wasn't given the chance to be their big sister.

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  6. Children are undergoing different stages. We should always be aware of that. They do not understand the world ahead of them. The import thing we should do is to be their for them till they grow old, guide them and correct them with all our best. Kids will always be kids. Anyway when they get older and clearly understand life, they will change for the best. The best person or children you want them to be. For now we should let them enjoy their childhood. Have fun and learn with them. This is one of the essence of life.

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